The 2 Money Principles That Helped Me Break Free From £40,000 of Debt.

Getting out of debt as a mum feels impossible when you're in the middle of it. Bills are piling up, unexpected costs keep appearing, and no matter how hard you try, you can't seem to get ahead.

I know that feeling. For seven years I was trapped in a cycle of credit card debt and loans, watching the balance grow even as I tried to pay it down. At its worst I was carrying £40,000 in debt with no clear path out.

What finally changed everything wasn't a windfall or a magic budgeting app. It was learning and consistently applying two fundamental money principles that most of us are never taught.

The Two Principles That Changed My Financial Life

After years of struggling with debt, I finally understood why I couldn't break free. I was breaking two of the most fundamental money principles. 

Those two principles are:

1. Spend less than you earn

2. Pay yourself first

These sound simple, almost too simple in fact. But implementing them consistently is what separates people who stay stuck in debt from people who eventually get free.

Let me explain what each one means and why they matter so much.

Principle 1: Spend Less Than You Earn

This is the foundation of all financial stability, yet it's surprisingly easy (and common) to ignore. 

Why This Matters

If you're spending more than you earn, even by a small amount, you will never get out of debt. You can work as hard as you want paying down balances, but if more is going out than coming in each month, you're fighting a losing battle.

For years I was overspending every single month. I'd pay £500 toward my credit card debt, then spend £700 the next month because I didn't have cash to cover my expenses. I was working hard but making no progress.

How To Know If You're Breaking This Rule

Most people genuinely don't know if they're spending more than they earn because they don't track it.

Here's your starting point: track every penny you spend for one month. Use an app, a spreadsheet, or even just a notebook. Don't judge yourself, just track it honestly. I use the Emma app (nice name right ;-p) — it's really user friendly and gives me the full picture. Of all the apps I've tried it's my favourite. Disclosure: This is a referral link. If you sign up using my link I'll receive Emma credits at no extra cost to you. https://emma.to/emmasithole

At the end of the month, compare your total spending to your income. If the spending number is higher, you've found the root cause of why you can't get ahead.

From there, find one expense to reduce. Not ten. Just one. Small changes compound over time.

Principle 2: Pay Yourself First

This principle is what actually breaks the debt cycle.

What This Means

Paying yourself first means that before you pay bills, before you buy groceries, before you do anything else, you transfer money into savings.

Even if it's just £10 or £20 a month. You pay yourself first.

Why This Works

When you pay everyone else first and try to save whatever is left over, there's never anything left over. But when you flip the order and save first, you force yourself to live on the rest. And you start building a buffer.

That buffer is everything. When unexpected costs come up (and they always do), you have money set aside to handle them without reaching for a credit card. That's what breaks the cycle.

How To Start

Set up an automatic transfer for the day you get paid. Pick an amount that feels manageable. £10 a week is £520 a year. That's a buffer you didn't have before.

As your financial situation improves, you can increase the amount. But start with something, and do it every single time money comes in.

Why These Principles Work Together

Here's the powerful part: these two principles reinforce each other.

When you spend less than you earn, you create space to pay yourself first. And when you pay yourself first, you build a buffer that makes it easier to stay within your income because you're not constantly scrambling to cover surprises.

I'm not going to pretend it was fast or easy for me. It took years to change my habits and apply these principles consistently. But slowly, steadily, my financial life transformed. I stopped relying on credit. I built savings. I cleared the debt.

And the day I made that final debt payment, I felt something I hadn't felt in years: freedom.

If You're Ready To Take Back Control

These two principles are the foundation. But there's more to the journey than just knowing what to do. The real work is in changing habits, staying consistent, and navigating the emotional and practical challenges that come up along the way.

If you want ongoing support as you work through this, I write a free bi-weekly newsletter called Back in the Game for mums who are done feeling financially trapped and ready to build real stability for themselves and their families.

Every two weeks I share honest stories, practical guidance, and the real lessons I've learned from clearing £40,000 in debt and building towards financial freedom. No jargon. No judgment. Just real talk from someone who has been exactly where you are.